Emin Olun Espiri Anlayışına Sahibiz

Aşağıda Başkonsolos Yardımcımız Sn. Ohad Avidan Kaynar’ın Hitler reklamı ve Yahudi espiri anlayışıyla ilgili kaleme aldığı yazıyı, kaleme alınmış olduğu dil olan İngilizce dilinde bulabilirsiniz.

Oh we can take a joke, I assure you!

Since all good spiels [Yiddish for sales pitch] start with a Joke, this one will be no different:

A rabbi and a priest are on an airplane together. 
The priest asks the rabbi if Judaism still prohibits eating pork. the rabbi said it does .
The priest asks the rabbi has he ever eaten pork. the rabbi said he did one time .
The rabbi asks the priest if his vows require him to be celibate. the priest said they do.
The rabbi asks the priest if he had ever had sex. the priest admitted one time he did.
The rabbi says:”beats the hell out of a pork sandwich doesn’t it…”

Now that I’ve got your attention we can proceed with the business at hand:

Trying to find a Wikipedia entry for Christian humor, led me to believe that the Christians may have none… I reached this conclusion since I could not find a Wikipedia entry of that nature. …[relax Christians, you know I'm Kidding] Islamic humor on the other hand did have an entry, it was a dainty little tidbit approximately one paragraph long, stating that Muslims do in fact have a sense of humor and that it dates back to the days of the Prophet. Them are the “cold hard facts!” no place to argue.

 But Jews on the other hand…

Well, I had to scroll down about fifteen times just to reach the end of that Entry.

So either we take a damn long time explaining things [we usually do] or it could just be, the writer of that entry, knowing that mostly Jews would read the Kibbitz [Yiddish again] that was there, couldn’t resist the chance to tell a few good ones along the way.

Why am I writing about all this?

Well you see there was that commercial…

And I thought to myself:”really?! Hitler?! That’s what sells soap?”

You see as a good Jew who is used to applying the darkest humor to the worst occasions [Yes I know it’s a defense mechanism] even my mind raced to the fact that the Nazis used to make soap out of Jewish cadavers, adding that to the fact Biomen prides itself on 100% natural materials [Yuck who would want that anyway…] and that it’s a shampoo for “Real Men”, leads me to connect the dots in a very certain way… [Triple Yuck!!! Human soap for "Real Men" ??? That’s just nasty]  

Now the question remains, was it funny?

My conclusion: No

And I’ll tell you why: You see even at the heart of darkness that is called Holocaust humor [Yes it exists, Yes it's very taboo, No you won't find many telling these kinds of jokes – they are offensive] there is a structure and a purpose. It takes the form of self-deprecating comments on Jewish culture, acting as a shield against anti-Semitic stereotypes, by exploiting them first, Here is an example: 

A non Jew wanted to get into his town’s “temple” on Yom Kippur, but without a ticket they wouldn’t let him in. He said, “Look, I just want to give a message to a friend in there.” But the usher at the door insists, “Sorry, you’ve got to have a ticket.” The guy replies, “Just let me in for one minute, then I’ll be right out.” “Well, all right,” says the usher, “but I’d better not catch you praying!”

You see what was done there – We portrayed ourselves as the narrow minded, we laughed about us being the cheap ones, thinking that everyone wants to cheat us, and that our religion is “all that”. It’s a good laugh, a healthy self critical one; it’s a pillar of our religion. [No seriously]

“Humor is the intellectual and legal methods of the Talmud, which uses elaborate legal arguments and situations often seen as so absurd as to be humorous in order to tease out the meaning of religious law.” [Wikipedia – Jewish Humor]

And so when Hulusi Derici, the creator of that nasty Hitler soap commercial, said [in loose translation] that the commercial was meant to ridicule Hitler. Later, that “Some people” just don’t get it, and that it’s their problem. And finally retracting the commercial, and saying that:”Jews are just too sensitive” well that’s what we call in Hebrew: “Chet Al Pesha” which means: “Adding a crime to an Injustice…”

It reminds me of this great joke told in Israel:

Dan Rather, Katie Couric [American journalists] and an Israeli commando were captured by terrorists in Iraq.  The leader of the terrorists told them that he would grant them each one last request before they were beheaded.  Dan Rather said, “Well, I’m a Texan, so I’d like one last bowlful of hot spicy chili.” The leader nodded to an underling, who left and returned with the chili.  Rather ate it all and said, “Now I can die content.” Katie Couric said, “I’m a reporter to the end. I want to take out my tape recorder and describe the scene here and what’s about to happen. Maybe someday someone will hear it and know that I was on the job till the end.” The terror leader directed an aide to hand over the tape recorder, and Couric dictated some comments. She then said, “Now I can die happy.” The leader turned and said, “And now, Mr. Israeli tough guy, what is your final wish?” “Kick me in the ass,” said the Israeli. “What?!?” asked the leader.  “Will you mock us in your last hour?” “No, I’m not kidding. I want you to kick me in the ass,” insisted the Israeli. So the leader shoved him into the open and kicked him hard in the ass.  The soldier went sprawling. But rolled to his knees, pulled a 9 mm pistol from under his flak jacket, and shot the leader dead. In the resulting confusion, he jumped to his knapsack, pulled out his carbine and sprayed the terrorists with gunfire.  In a flash, all terrorists were either dead or fleeing for their lives.  As the soldier untied Rather and Couric, they asked him, “Why didn’t you just shoot them in the beginning?  Why did you ask them to kick you first?”  “What?” replied the Israeli, “and have you two report that I was the aggressor?!”

And So Mr. Hulusi Derici, if you still think Jews are too sensitive, and can’t take a Joke…

Well: Jason Alexander, Woody Allen, Tom Arnold, Hank Azaria, Sacha Baron Cohen, Mel Brooks, Milton Berle, Lenny Bruce, Billy Crystal, Rodney Dangerfield, Larry David, Fran Drescher, Richard Dreyfuss, Al Franken, Jeff Goldblum, Gilbert Gottfried, Buddy Hackett, Goldie Hawn, Curly Howard, Moe Howard, Shemp Howard, Al Jolson, Andy Kaufman, Danny Kaye, Jerry Lewis, Richard Lewis, Jon Lovitz, Howie Mandel, Chico Marx, Groucho Marx, Gummo Marx, Harpo Marx, Zeppo Marx, Jackie Mason, Bette Midler, Larry Miller, Gilda Radner, Seth Rogen, Rita Rudner, Andy Samberg, Adam Sandler, David Schwimmer, Jerry Seinfeld, Peter Sellers, Garry Shandling, Jon Stewart and Sarah Silverman

Would kindly beg to differ…

[The writer is the Deputy Consul General of Israel in Istanbul– A Jew, and a rabid fan of Stand-up Comedy done by all Races, Ethnicities, Sexes, and Religions]